Do you ever wonder how people become so gross? I'm sure you remember people in college who just were complete pigs. I'm talking DISGUSTING. Well I'm sick of it. I'm taking a stand. No more dirtiness people! To shame those who have graced me with their nastiness, I'm going to make a list of the grossest people I've ever known:
Becky - Little girl in the neighborhood growing up. My sister babysat for her family once and they were so gross! She said they kept a "gum bowl". And in that bowl, they would place the gum they "hadn't quite finished chewing" so they could pick it back up later to finish. Problem was, they didn't always come back for it, so sometimes there would just be month old gum in the bottom of the bowl, along with the fresh gum on top. EW! They also let their cats have free reign of the house. Bathrooms, kitchen, refrigerator, etc.
Brian (NOT my husband, just to clarify!)- Another kid from the neighborhood (we had some gross neighbors back in the day). He would walk around picking his nose ALL THE TIME, and then he would eat it.
Cheri - She's famous with my middle school/high school peers. She was visibly dirty. I mean, dirt streaks on her face. There's an old urban legend that one day she was walking out from the locker room, and a pair of dirty underwear fell out of the bottom of her jeans (streak marks and everything). The gym teacher then proceeded to kick them out to the middle of the floor and demand who know who's dirty underwear was left in the gymnasium. She ran to pick them up and put them in her backpack.
Amanda - My freshman year college roommate. She's the reason I hate hippies. She's so dirty she gives hippies a bad name. I honestly believe she showered approximately 10 times during our ENTIRE freshman year of college. And I'm not exaggerating one bit. I could go into more horror stories of her dirty boyfriend and patchouli, but I'll spare you the details.
Pat - This woman sat in the cubicle next to me at work. She told me once she couldn't find her work badge because she had placed it on her ironing board, and then could never find it again. I didn't understand that statement until I took a ride in her car once. The outside was covered, I'm talking completely covered in bird crap. And that was just the outside...... The inside floor was covered in cheerios. There was a half eaten apple (that looked like it was several weeks old) in the backseat. There were Wheat Thins all over the backseat, crumbled up tissues on the dashboard, used baby wipes in the passenger's seat and that's just getting started. I have nightmares about Pat and her car to this day.
Dude at the Olive Garden - Possibly the nastiest eating experience I've ever had in my life. Dude comes in with his family, and they just look dirty. You know what kind of people I'm talking about. Like they grew up in the swamp. They sat down next to me and Bri and the smell was almost unbearable. At the end of the meal, dude stands half-way up so he's hovering over his seat, and rips out the LOUDEST fart I've ever heard in my life. I was sitting about two and a half feet away from him. Bri and I looked at each other with our mouth's hanging open for about two seconds, and then I promptly ran out of the restaurant. I was afraid of the stench that would follow. I will never set foot in another Olive Garden as long as I live.
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